you guys like to party
You do with Santa what your society has done with all of nature’s gifts. You are not ready. You do not understand. Perhaps some day, you will be ready. Until then, Santa waits.
I’ve had a rough year.
Everyone at the North Pole knew the 24th was the worst — because that was the night Gary put on the big boy tights and ran the show. Fuck you, Gary.
Most of the marriages were anulled for one reason or the other.
Gentlemen. Let the games begin.
Santa, WE’LL CALL YOU
You’re going down, BROWN
Ikea Monkey, Santa Chimp. Santa Chimp, Ikea Monkey.
Let me have a diablo sandwich, a Dr Pepper. Make it fast. I’m in a goddamn hurry.
It’s looking rough this year, kids. We’re gonna need to bring some Santas out of retirement.